Archive for the ‘Musings’ Category

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Tales of an Ingenue

Sunday, June 27th, 2010

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Theater is a funny thing. You never know how shows are going to end up. You never know which shows are going to really stick with you and which ones you’ll happily move on from. Oh Boy! ended up being the best theatrical experience I’ve had in some time. I fell madly, deeply in love with this little unknown show. It was a gem. It was extremely special.

A couple of things to know: Oh Boy! was Jeff-Recommended, It is extending its run, and I can’t extend with it.

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I’m feeling very sentimental this morning. Today is the last day of the original run. Today is my last show and I am going to miss this show immeasurably.  My roommate always teases me that I only like this show as much as I do because of the pretty costumes. And to be perfectly honest, that’s part of it. But it’s not just the costumes, it’s the whole package. I never get to do this. I never got to play the girly, pretty, effervescent roles that I would fantasize about while putting on my fatsuit, or unibrow, crazy wig, or whatever else my crazy character role required.

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This was a breath of pretty, frothy, lovely, fresh air and I loved every minute of it. I just loved playing Lou Ellen. She was such a sweeetheart and so pure and loyal. Lou Ellen was cupcakes and butterflies and cotton candy and rainbows. It was nice to live that for a while. I’m sure starting tomorrow it’ll be back to playing whores and witches again, which I LOVE…don’t get me wrong, but this was a nice change.

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Who knew that a character that sings “I want to be a good little wife in the good old-fashioned way. I’ll honor and obey. From my home I’ll never stray,” would end up being one of the most liberating roles I’ve ever played. Theater is a funny FUNNY thing and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

***All photos by Johnny Knight***

Posted in Musings, The Scoop on Harmony | No Comments »

Time Off: Part 2

Sunday, April 11th, 2010

So I wrote a whole blog HERE about how time off can be depressing for an actor. There’s the fear of never working again and what not. blah blah blah. What I didn’t write about in that blog is about how glorious it can be. I’ve had a social life! I’ve had nights in. I’ve been able to watch tv when the programs are actually on! I’ve been able to cook and have friends over on weeknights. I reconnected with people I haven’t seen in years because I had the time to do it! I did tons of thinking. I was able to spend more time on my auditions and I booked my summer because of it. I got to spend time with my roommate. A lot of time LOL. When we’re both working on shows, we don’t see much of each other. I didn’t have to plan my week to the nth degree. I was able to be a little spontaneous. I got to be lazy. I got to be productive. I got to be creative. I got to relax. I was able to help out with Bailiwick Chicago behind the scenes because I actually had the TIME.

I think, as many of us do, that I replace my personal life with my professional life sometimes. Or that they become the same thing. When you’re doing well in your career you’re able to hide behind it and fill gaps in your life with your successes. When suddenly you don’t have a gig, or you’re waiting for your next one, you have to deal with your real life. You have to deal with the areas of your life that seem lacking. It can be hard, but it’s also a time of growth and self awareness. I didn’t have “the stage” to distract me with its glamour and its heartache. It’s so important for us as artists to have lives separate from our stage personas. Otherwise what are we bringing to our art?

I’ve said before that an actor’s ability is limited to the extent of their experience and their imagination. The more experience you have the more you have to draw from. We should be as daring and fearless in life as we are on stage. That is my goal. That is what I strive for. I want to live this life so absolutely that it can’t help but seep into my work in the theater. I don’t want to pass up any opportunities. No more being afraid. No more missed connections. They make me sad. Take a chance on people! Don’t be afraid to love. Be brave my friends! Be brave and be fabulous!

I’ve overindulged a bit this last three months, but it felt wonderful. I felt really alive and I feel like I have something new to bring to the table now. I start rehearsals for Oh Boy! tomorrow and then I’m booked everyday through the summer with a list of things that keeps growing. I’m extremely excited to have so much coming up, but I’m also a little sad that my break is over. It has truly been life-changing. When I am insanely busy again, I need to remember not to neglect the Harmony that isn’t on stage all the time. She deserves some attention too. I will neglect her no longer!!!

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After reading this through I’ve realized that I sound like a combination of  a hippie and a psycho. I do apologize. Some things just must be said, even if they’re a little scatter-brained.

Thank you for sticking with me through my insanity. HAPPY SPRING!!!!!

Harmony

Posted in Harmony's sage advice, Inspiration, Musings | No Comments »

Reviews, Reviewers, and the like…

Friday, March 19th, 2010

Reviewers/critics/what have you, can make or break your show. We are told repeatedly not to care what the reviews say, but the fact of the matter is it puts butts in the seats if the show is reviewed well. For anyone who has worn a producing hat from time to time, you understand how important it is. Smaller theater companies, particularly Non-Equity ones, rely on good reviews because of their lack of an advertising budget. Because of this, when we know reviewers are coming everyone goes a little batty. Houses are papered (tickets are given away), audiences are filled with friendly faces that will enjoy the show in an obvious way. Each director/producer has a different way of handling whether the actors know about the reviewers or not. In some companies they drill it into your head so that you know WHAT’S AT STAKE! In other companies it’s kept as top secret information lest the actors find out and it influences the show.

I’ve seen actors and other theater professionals take to their bed for a week after a bad review or, heaven forbid, a bout of bad reviews. I’ve seen people’s performances fall apart due to the onset of insecurity that comes from a bad notice. I’ve seen actors CHANGE their performance to match what a reviewer says. It’s all very silly, but in a business that can be thankless, good reviews and accolades are a nice boost to keep us going. Bad reviews have an adverse effect.

I used to get extremely wrapped up in all of this. Good reviews made me feel like I was on top of the world and bad reviews made me feel like a huge pile of crap. This continued until I did Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Tell me on a Sunday. It’s a one-woman musical and I got more reviews than I ever had before because I was the only actor on stage. There was no getting around it. We probably got about 13 reviews for the show from opening through the extension. My day would be good, or bad, depending on what had been written about me that day.

On one night I received 4 reviews with 4 completely different perspectives. One thought I pretty much sucked all around. One thought I was fabulous and the hottest ticket in town. One said that I was a weak actor, but had a great voice and one said that I was a weak singer, but a great actor.

After receiving all of these highly conflicting reviews I did something I hadn’t thought to do yet. I laughed it off. I realized how ridiculous I was being to believe everything that was being written about me whether good or bad. Clearly they couldn’t ALL be right! Their opinions didn’t match up at all, and that’s what they are…OPINIONS. It is one individual giving an opinion. That’s it. Not just that, but we don’t know what goes into that opinion. Anything from the reviewers health, mood that day, dinner before the show, comfort of their seat, what the weather is, whether they have pre-conceived notions, whether they like the playwright/composer/ etc. etc. etc. into infinity effects both good and bad reviews.

Also, they are seeing ONE performance. They don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes. They don’t know when you’re sick, lost a loved one, are having an off night, broke up with your boyfriend, etc. etc. etc. into infinity. They don’t know for instance that an actress’ pants went missing right before the show and she had to wear something that was supposed to be a long shirt as a dress and bend down and pick things up and try not to flash the audience her hoo-hah in the process. The reviewer didn’t know all of that before writing that the actress seemed “self conscious about her body.” I don’t know WHO this actress is by the way. It’s not me!!!! Pretend I didn’t tell this story. I made it all up. Moving on…

I’m not trying to diminish the importance of reviewers in this business at all. There are certain reviewers in this city that are brilliant and who I really trust. I’ve also been in many a show that the reviewers were our best friends. They saved our show. They made people come see it. It can be a wonderful thing! My POINT is (thank goodness, right?) let the producers worry about the reviews. As actors our only responsibility is to be true to the text, take care of our bodies, and to follow our direction. That’s it! The other stuff is out of our control. If this means that you have to not read the reviews to keep from getting upset than DON’T! I know many actors that don’t. If you do choose to read them just remember it’s just normal people with opinions. Don’t let it define you!

That is my wisdom for the day…

Harmony

“In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face is that, in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new.”  -Anton Ego (Ratatouille!)

Posted in Embarrassing stories, Harmony's sage advice, Musings | No Comments »

The Cat’s out of the bag…

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

So as I kept hinting…I had kind of a big audition yesterday. About a month ago I decided that I wanted to take my career in a different direction. Not to eliminate the successes and connections I’ve already made (translation: not to give up Musical Theatre), but rather to broaden my horizons. I decided that I wanted to start focusing on more plays and on-camera opportunities, along with musical theatre.

As far as musical theatre goes, I’m kind of stuck between types right now. This last year or so I’ve played everything from a 50 year old wicked stepmother to a 22 year old bright eyed ingenue. People don’t really seem to know where to place me right now, which is both a curse and a blessing. It’s a blessing because since I’m not an obvious type I get to play an array of different kinds of roles. I’m not stuck playing the same thing over and over. It’s a curse because when I audition for something I don’t always know what role to tailor for. If I know the director it helps because then I sort of know what they normally see me as. And of course there are those wonderful directors that take chances on me again and again like Sheldon Patinkin, David Zak, and Elizabeth Margolius. They don’t stick me in a box. They let me play something completely different each time I work with them and THAT my friends, is a blessing.

What does all this have to do with the audition? I’m getting there I promise! I have been between shows so I had a lot of time to think. I thought about the last couple of years. I thought about how I always feel like I need a show whether I’m really interested in the project or not. I thought about how I’m instantly handicapped with many of these musicals I’m auditioning for because I’m not a dancer. I thought about the last time I was truly happy and artistically satisfied during a theatrical production. I thought about what exactly makes me happy about being an actor and what doesn’t. I thought about all these things and decided to make some changes.

The first couple of changes were small. I said no to a project I didn’t feel passionate about. This was really hard for me! I went to non-musical generals for a company instead of their musical generals even though I may have fared better at the musical ones. It was my first non-musical audition in 5 years. I was extremely nervous. I also didn’t audition for a project that I really wanted. That may sound counter-intuitive, but for me it gave me back the power over my career. I decided that it was better for me to make a decision that was really hard for me, than to do the same thing I’ve been doing for years. Rather than get frustrated over circumstances I couldn’t control, I started to prepare to move in a completely new direction. I applied for the School at Steppenwolf.

About a week ago I was notified that I’d been granted an audition and yesterday I had the audition. It was terrifying for me. I had to prepare two monologues and a scene. I didn’t have my voice to hide behind. I was so intimidated that I was sort of paralyzed the first half of the week not knowing where to start or HOW to begin.

I snapped out of it though and did my prep work and worked with my talented roommate a bit. I felt ready when I went, and I have to say it was one of the best auditions of my life. It may have even been the best. I was floating when I left. I almost started crying on the train. I was so proud of myself for conquering my fears and putting myself out of my comfort zone. I don’t know if they thought I did as well as I did, or how I measure up to the other candidates, or if I have a real shot at this or not, and frankly I HONESTLY DON’T CARE. I’ve won. Regardless of what happens I’ve won. All of this has propelled me in a new direction. I don’t know if it’ll lead to Steppenwolf, but I know it will lead somewhere that I wasn’t heading before. I’ve taken another fork in the road, and it was hard, and it makes it all the more sweet.

I just want to say one more thing. Even though I didn’t share it on my blog, I did talk to many of the people that I trust in my life about it. Not one person doubted me. Not one person didn’t think I could do it. On the contrary, my confidants believed in me so strongly that I didn’t have a choice but to believe in myself. I am truly blessed to have these people in my life. Now in true Oscar fashion I’m going to name names until they cut me off with the music:

THANK YOU Sheldon Patinkin, Janet Louer, Scott Olson, David Zak, Eric Martin, Brenda Didier, (music starts playing) HOLD ON! Lili-Anne Brown, Andra-Velis Simon, Jessica Cook, Jennifer Grubb, Danni Smith, Laura McClain, Adam Minegar, Annie Passanisi,(music gets louder) I WILL NOT LEAVE WITHOUT THANKING MY FAMILY! Mom and Dad, Gabe, Jonathan, Grandpa, and every single person who listened to me talk things out. It’s meant the world to me. (they threaten to cut to commercial) Love YOU! Support live theater! (they pull me off the stage by my hair)

Harmony

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Posted in Inspiration, Musings | 5 Comments »

The good, the bad, and the UGLY

Friday, February 26th, 2010

There is so much to be thankful for. I am surrounded by people that are so talented that it’s almost unbelievable. On a daily basis I get to be inspired by my peers. This week was no exception. In a two day period I was able to see Private Lives at Chicago Shakespeare, Fiddler on the Roof at the Marriott, and attend a benefit celebration for a company I’ve worked with and have a place in my heart for: Bohemian Theatre Ensemble. This weekend I’m going to see some Tennessee Williams directed by my dear friend David Zak and last week I saw the stunning production of Oh Coward! at Writer’s theatre. Next week I’m going to see the opening of Chess at Theo Ubique, my wonderful friend Danni Smith in Living Quarters for Strangeloop theater, and the lovely Christin Boulette in Pride and Prejudice at the Chamber Opera Chicago. This is not to mention getting to see my roommate in Bailiwick Chicago’s  Show us Your Love every weekend. He’s one talented fellow.

If you didn’t get it, that’s the “good.” The inspiration, support, and strength I get from my friends, family, and peers is invaluable and keeps me going day to day.

We don’t really need to talk about the “bad,” do we? Poor wages, scraping by, rejection, blah blah blah blah blah. I get tired of talking about it. You get it. It’s not as rosy and glamorous as people who are NOT in-the-know would think.

Let’s talk about the “ugly,” shall we? This career can be hard enough as we briefly covered in the bad section. What makes it worse is ugly behavior. There is back stabbing, drama, jealousy, rumor starting, deceit, unhealthy competitiveness, downright vindictiveness, and the worst… bad-mouthing a peer to a fellow professional. It’s the underbelly of the Chicago theater community and it’s frankly gross. I have from one time or another been a victim of all of that behavior and so have most the people I know. It’s just not conducive to anyone.

Now we ALL TALK. That’s a given. And of course we’re going to bitch about each other from time to time to friends and lovers. Everyone in ANY career field does that about their co-workers. I would just like to request that we try to stay positive, that we try to be happy for each other’s successes even if it’s hard sometimes, and that under no circumstances do we attempt to hurt someone else’s career. We already have so many strikes against us just for the mere fact that we want to be actors. Why make it harder for ourselves than it has to be? And if none of that works just think about a little thing called karma. I strongly believe in karma and what goes around comes around. So let’s look out for each other!

I’ll leave you with a quote that was going around FB a couple of days ago:

We live in an era of enormous cynicism. Do not be fooled.

Don’t act for money. You’ll start to feel dead and bitter.

Don’t act for glory. You’ll start to feel dead, fat and fearful.

We live in an era of enormous cynicism. Do not be fooled.

You can’t avoid all the pitfalls. There are lies you must tell. But experience the lie. See it as something dead and unconnected you clutch. And let it go.

Act from the depth of your feeling imagination. Act for celebration, for search, for grieving, for worship, to express that desolate sensation of wandering through the howling wilderness.

Don’t worry about Art.

Do these things and it will be Art.

John Patrick Shanley

AND PLEASE CHECK OUT THESE SHOWS AND SUPPORT LIVE THEATRE!!!!!!!

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Private Lives

Chicago Shakespeare Theater

Following his celebrated production of Amadeus this season, CST’s own Gary Griffin directs Noël Coward’s stylish, savvy comedy about the people we can neither live with—nor without. Divorcés Amanda and Elyot meet up again quite by accident—on their second honeymoons, with brand-new spouses in tow. Fireworks fly as their reunion reveals just how quickly romance—and rivalry—can be rekindled.

Thru - Mar 7, 2010

Fri, Feb 26: 7:30pm
Sat, Feb 27: 3:00pm & 8:00pm
Tue, Mar 2: 7:30pm
Wed, Mar 3: 1:00pm & 7:30pm
Thu, Mar 4: 7:30pm
Sat, Mar 6: 3:00pm & 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 7: 2:00pm

Price:$44-$75

Show Type: Comedy

Box Office: 312-595-5600

www.chicagoshakes.com

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Fiddler on the Roof

Marriott Theatre In Lincolnshire

This Tony Award-winning musical has captured the hearts of people all over the world. It is the bittersweet tale of a family coping with a changing world. Tevye, a Jewish dairyman, and his family live in a small village in 1905 Tsarist Russia. With the help of the local matchmaker, Tevye and his wife are in search of acceptable husbands for their three lively daughters. While their daughters are determined to break tradition and marry the men they love, Tevye begins to face bigger issues as Jews are being persecuted in his homeland. A hopeful celebration of the human spirit, Fiddler on the Roof features an unforgettable score with music by Jerry Bock, lyrics by Sheldon Harnick, and book by Joseph Stein.

Thru - Apr 25, 2010

Wednesdays: 1:00pm & 8:00pm
Thursdays: 8:00pm
Fridays: 8:00pm
Saturdays: 4:30pm & 8:00pm
Sundays: 1:00pm & 5:00pm

Price:$35-$55

Show Type: Musical

Box Office: 847-634-0200

www.marriotttheatre.com
0811213803Not About Nightingales

CCPA at Roosevelt University

First written in 1938,the script remained unproduced until 1998. This early work was written by Tennessee Williams when he was only 27, before any of the great plays that established his later reputation. Based on true events, this play attempts to shine a spotlight on the corruption, degradation and murder that occur in prisons, outside the light of social norms of human decency. In the setting of an “escape proof” prison, acts of torture and brutality replace humanity, in this work that Williams described as filled with unprecedented violence and horror.

By Tennessee Williams
Directed by David Zak

Friday and Saturday Feb. 26 and 27 at 7:30pm
Sunday Feb. 28 at 2pm

$10 General Admission
$6 Students/Seniors/ INDUSTRY

(312) 341-3831

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Oh Coward!

Writers’ Theatre

You’re invited to a marvelous party at Writers’ Theatre! Weaving together songs and literary delights, Oh Coward! celebrates one of the theater’s greatest entertainers, Noel Coward. His effervescent music and charming quips combine for an unforgettable evening of the most memorable tunes of the 20th century.

Thru - Apr 18, 2010

Fri, Feb 26: 8:00pm
Sat, Feb 27: 4:00pm & 8:00pm
Tue, Mar 2: 7:30pm
Wed, Mar 3: 7:30pm
Thu, Mar 4: 8:00pm
Sat, Mar 6: 4:00pm & 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 7: 2:00pm & 6:00pm
Wed, Mar 10: 2:00pm & 7:30pm
Thu, Mar 11: 8:00pm
Fri, Mar 12: 8:00pm
Sat, Mar 13: 4:00pm & 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 14: 2:00pm & 6:00pm
Wed, Mar 17: 2:00pm & 7:30pm
Thu, Mar 18: 8:00pm
Fri, Mar 19: 8:00pm
Sat, Mar 20: 4:00pm & 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 21: 2:00pm
Tue, Mar 23: 7:30pm
Wed, Mar 24: 7:30pm
Thu, Mar 25: 8:00pm
Fri, Mar 26: 8:00pm
Tue, Mar 30: 7:30pm
Wed, Mar 31: 7:30pm
Thu, Apr 1: 8:00pm
Sat, Apr 3: 4:00pm & 8:00pm
Sun, Apr 4: 2:00pm & 6:00pm
Tue, Apr 6: 7:30pm
Wed, Apr 7: 7:30pm
Thu, Apr 8: 8:00pm
Fri, Apr 9: 8:00pm
Tue, Apr 13: 7:30pm
Thu, Apr 15: 8:00pm
Sun, Apr 18: 2:00pm & 6:00pm

Price:$40-$60

Stage: Performed at 664 Vernon Avenue

Show Type: Musical

Box Office: 847-242-6000

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Chess

No Exit Cafe

Chess is a Cold War musical, first premiering in the 1980s, with lyrics by Tim Rice and music by former ABBA members, Bjorn Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson. Among the notable hit songs from the cult musical are One Night in Bangkok and I Know Him So Well.

Presented by Theo Ubique Cabaret Theatre

Previews: Mar 5 - Mar 6, 2010

Regular Run: Mar 7 - Apr 25, 2010

Sat, Mar 6: 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 7: 7:00pm
Thu, Mar 11: 8:00pm
Fri, Mar 12: 8:00pm
Sat, Mar 13: 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 14: 7:00pm
Thu, Mar 18: 8:00pm
Fri, Mar 19: 8:00pm
Sat, Mar 20: 8:00pm
Sun, Mar 21: 7:00pm
Thu, Mar 25: 8:00pm
Fri, Mar 26: 8:00pm
Thu, Apr 1: 8:00pm
Sat, Apr 3: 8:00pm
Sun, Apr 4: 7:00pm
Thu, Apr 8: 8:00pm
Fri, Apr 9: 8:00pm
Thu, Apr 15: 8:00pm
Fri, Apr 16: 8:00pm
Sun, Apr 18: 7:00pm
Thu, Apr 22: 8:00pm
Fri, Apr 23: 8:00pm
Sat, Apr 24: 8:00pm
Sun, Apr 25: 7:00pm

Price:$15-$30

Show Type: Musical

Box Office: 800-595-4849

www.theoubique.org

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Living Quarters

Trap Door Theatre

Subtitled After Hippolytus and first produced by Dublin’s Abbey Theatre in 1977, Living Quarters recasts the mythology of Theseus, Hippolytus, and Phaedra into an isolated Donegal homestead.Commandant Frank Butler returns home to Ireland as a hero after saving nine United Nations peacekeepers from enemy fire during a siege in the Middle East. Reunited to celebrate Frank’s triumph are three daughters and a son by his first marriage and the young wife Frank married days before his deployment. But the revelation of secrets kept while Frank was away threatens to divide the Butler house forever.

Presented by Strangeloop Theatre

Thru - Mar 14, 2010

Thursdays: 8:00pm
Fridays: 8:00pm
Saturdays: 8:00pm
Sundays: 2:00pm

Price:$10-$15

Show Type: Drama

Box Office: 773-276-0458

www.strangelooptheatre.org

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Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice: A Musical Play

Jane Austen revisits her rejected first novel, First Impressions, and overcomes all obstacles to transform it into the timeless classic, Pride & Prejudice. What writers Lindsay Warren Baker and Amanda Jacobs have accomplished is not just a powerful, musical retelling of a classic love story. They show us, through the journey of the author herself, what it takes to create a masterpiece. See Elizabeth and Darcy’s romance come to life from a whole new perspective and immerse yourself in Austen’s creative process as she interacts with the very characters she has created.

By Lindsay Warren Baker and Amanda Jacobs
Directed by Steven Daigle
Orchestra conducted by Victoria Bond

Saturday, February 27, 2010, 7:30pm
Saturday, March 6, 7:30pm
Sunday, March 7, 3:00pm (with Christin Boulette Dorton)

Chamber Opera Chicago Office/Studio

Tel: 312-951-7944
FAX: 312-951-7948

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Show Us Your Love

Mary’s Attic

Show Us Your Love celebrates love and relationships, featuring both comic and dramatic selections from some of Broadway and Off-Broadway’s very best, including HAIR, SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH GEORGE, PIPPIN, FLOYD COLLINS and BROOKLYN THE MUSICAL. Audience members will have an opportunity to “show us their love” by informally voting for their favorite shows, which will influence Bailiwick Chicago’s show selection process for future seasons.

Presented by Bailiwick Chicago

Thru - Mar 28, 2010

Sundays: 7:30pm

Price:$15

Show Type: Musical

www.bailiwickchicago.com

Posted in Harmony's sage advice, Musings, Talented Colleagues | No Comments »

Dancers

Wednesday, February 24th, 2010

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When I was five years old I was in ballet. My favorite book, which I still have in tatters and bound with brown tape, was Little Ballerina. I had a collection of tutus which I modeled shamelessly. Well, for whatever reason, I stopped. I think I asked to stop or maybe my parents couldn’t afford it anymore. For whatever reason…I stopped.

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Skip to high school. One of my closest friends, Tori, was a ballerina. I went to a couple of her recitals and ballets. I was so inspired by it. I signed up to start taking lessons again. I never made it to the first one. I couldn’t afford it and I lived about a 45 minute drive away. I was 15 at the time and couldn’t drive yet.

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Skip to college…well my third college (long story). I was a musical theatre major at Columbia College. I had to take ballet and jazz. I had to go shopping for a leotard as a grown woman which was a little frightening. I got through it though and I really LOVED barre work. It’s just you and the barre working on technique together. What I did not love was when I had to go “across the floor.” Those words make me shudder. Basically that means everyone takes turns going from one side of the room to the other doing some sort of combination of dance steps while everyone else watches. Horror. That’s the stuff of nightmares I tell you.

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I used to DREAD class because I knew that after my beloved barre work that I’d be required to “go across the floor.” I remember one day I was crossing Roosevelt Avenue downtown to get to class. If you’ve never been to downtown Chicago, you’ve missed out on the lovely wind tunnels that the sky scrapers create on certain streets. Roosevelt is a REALLY wide street, and when the wind is really going it can be really difficult to cross. You really have to bare down and make yourself as grounded as possible. One day it was so windy that my feet were barely staying on the ground. A bunch of ballerinas that were walking with me GRABBED ON TO ME. Their fight or flight reaction was to grab the STURDY one. “Her stocky legs will keep us from blowing into Lake Michigan!” I’m not sure why I just shared that story. I suppose I am still incredibly bitter about it. :-P How dare they!?!?!?!?!? :P

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Jazz class was almost all floor work. I would feel myself hyperventilating and breaking out into hives while crossing the dreaded Roosevelt wind tunnel to get to class on Tuesdays and Thursdays. And then as soon as class was over I started dreading the next one. I wasn’t even the worst person in the class or anything like that. I just had a phobia of people watching me GO ACROSS THE FLOOR. ACK! Anything but that!  Needless to say I became an acting major after the first year. I’d love to say that it’s due to me wanting to focus more on my acting. And to be fair, that was the majority of it. BUT I’d be completely full of it if I didn’t admit that part of it was my floor work phobia.

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If I have these kind of issues in dance class, you can imagine how I feel about DANCE CALLS.  hahaha Okay, honestly my phobia is way less debilitating than it used to be. I can make it through a dance call and not need a xanax instantly. I have also been in dozens of shows at this point that I’ve had to do some sort of choreography in. I’m not completely hopeless, but I know that I will never be a real dancer. I can fake it till I make it, but that’s about it.

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I have so much respect for dancers. It’s hard to even put it into words. I think it’s so beautiful to tell a story completely through your body. It’s amazing and I’m always in awe of it.

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The Aida dance call (which I was FACILITATING not dancing in) was REAL. The choreographers, Kevin Iega Jeff and Gary Abbott, are the Artistic Director and Associate Artistic Director respectively from the Deeply Rooted Dance Theater. The dance they put together for the dance call was so beautiful and passionate. There were moments of yearning, moments of anger, and moments of grace all worked into this 32 bar cut that they choreographed. I don’t know how Aida is all going to come together yet, but I can say completely confidently that the dance portion of it is going to be PHENOMENAL. I seriously can’t wait to see what they do with it. I continue to be inspired.

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Scenes from BEHIND the casting table

Wednesday, February 17th, 2010

I’m completely exhausted and my brain is fried. Callbacks started today. There are so many lessons to be learned from being on the other side of the casting table. Some are as common sense as “don’t apologize for mistakes, be prepared, and have a good attitude.” Others are way more subjective. Everyone in that room has opinions and is drawn to certain things. Some things are agreed upon. Some aren’t. I’m learning my own aesthetic and my own taste. Like for instance, I am much more drawn to someone who puts emphasis on their acting before their singing. I suppose I didn’t need to sit behind the table to tell you that. ;-)

Another thing I found myself responding to very much was people’s energies and how they held themselves. It must be from my Laban training. :-) (What is Laban you ask? I will do a post on it. I promise. In layman’s terms, it’s a study of different energies. Curious? Janet Louer is THE WOMAN…for coaching or Laban.) Everyone brings a different energy into the audition room with them. Some are light and playful. Some are grounded and regal. Some ooze sex. It’s so interesting to see. What REALLY impresses me is when someone walks in with one energy and then when they perform they transform to something completely different, but an energy that is still them and equally genuine. I like to be surprised!

So what advice do I have? Unfortunately, nothing you haven’t already heard. Go in. Be confident. Make strong choices. Be nice to everyone. Be patient. The biggest piece of advice I have is to leave the audition/callback in the audition room. My roommate is fantastic at this. I, on the other hand, sometimes take to my bed with a xanax. Just kidding! Sort of. I’m getting better at dealing with it.

The thing is, you really don’t know what the casting team wants. Sometimes the casting team doesn’t know what they want. So many things go into it and just because you don’t get the job doesn’t mean you weren’t EFFING awesome. It sucks, it’s not fair, but that’s just the way it is. Sometimes it’s look, sometimes it’s matching actors up, etc. The one thing it definitely is, is OUT of your control. So do this to please yourself! Do the auditions for you and then leave it in the theater Gods’ hands. If it’s right, it’ll happen. If it’s not, it won’t. It’s that simple. (Note to Harmony: read and heed your own advice!)

The last thing I can say is both encouraging and discouraging I suppose. Discouraging first: There is A LOT of talent out there. A shocking amount. There is a ton of competition. None of us are irreplaceable. It’s amazing how many truly talented, lovely, intelligent people will come out of the woodworks for a project they believe in.

BUT as a working actor I take comfort in the fact that I have stood there before, against all the talented people that Chicago has to offer, and guess what? I GOT THE JOB. And I keep getting the job. It hasn’t always been the job I wanted, but it’s THE job. I stood there and out of gobs of talented people, they chose me. If you think about it that way, it’s pretty special.

So I’ll leave you with that thought. If you didn’t get it, that was the ENCOURAGING part of it!

Oh by the way…..Operation Flapper Dress is working:

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The Flapper Dress Project

Thursday, February 11th, 2010

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So right now I’m supposed to be answering THIS question: What has your trajectory as an actor been up to this point and where do you want to go from here? (p.s. I promise I’ll stop dropping cryptic hints and let you guys know what I’m talking about soon.) Instead of answering that question, however, I find myself procrastinating and writing this blog.

So what is the Flapper Dress Project you ask?  Really it’s a fancy title for a weight loss effort. My rehearsals for Oh Boy! start a month from tomorrow so I’m doing a 30 day overhaul. Oh Boy! is being set in 1923. Let’s just say the flapper is not my most flattering dress shape. I’m much more of a corset and bustle kind of girl. So starting tomorrow I’m back on Jillain Michael’s 30-day shred and a low carb, low fat diet (pretty much like South Beach). I’m also restricting my booze intake to the weekends and only red wine and bloody marys :-) .

So now for the inevitable…I KNOW I’m not fat. I just want to point that out before all my friends start worrying about me. BUT I do have to wear a flapper dress and none of us want to see that right now. AND I DO have to do the Charleston (God help us all) and I really would rather not have things flopping around whilst doing so. The space at City Lit is only so big after all, and ingenues can’t have flabby arms. It’s my rule, no one else’s.

So….if you see me in 7-11 sitting on the floor ravenously eating a bag of barbecue chips, please slap me good and hard across the face and escort me out of there with some semblance of dignity. Thank goodness I’m not working in Munster, Indiana right now. Those Munster Doughnuts would be my downfall.

So wish me luck!

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TIME OFF

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

It’s 6pm, do you know where your actors are? Chances are they’re throwing their script in their bag. Perhaps they’re digging through their closet desperately trying to find their jazz shoes. Some are just getting off their “real job” jumping on the train and trying to make it to rehearsal in time. Some are probably grabbing a slim fast and a cheese stick at 7-11 hoping it’ll be enough to get them through until after their show.

Where is this actor? This actor is playing on my computer, baking a naughty cheesy potato bake, and getting ready to watch BIGGEST LOSER. Which is appropriate, because honestly when you’re between gigs it’s hard not to feel like the “biggest loser.” I know it doesn’t really make any sense. I have a show I’m really excited about that opens in May. So I’ll probably start working on that in early April/late March. So really worse case scenario I have three months off. That’s not the end of the world, right?

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT. For an actor it is. And if they say otherwise, they’re lying. When most of your friends are actors, the question you hear all the time is, “What are you working on right now?” We all ask it. We’re all guilty of it. I, and I would guess others too, fear not having an answer to that question.

For non-working actors the answer is usually, “I’m really looking forward to having some time off.” And this is partly true, but for ambitious actors there is always that panic of where the next job is going to come from. Or if you have a show lined up, you worry about what you’re going to have after that. It’s a constant struggle. There is absolutely NO job security. ARGH it’s enough to make me want to go back to the Navy. At least they have benefits and a retirement plan. LOL

Don’t worry, I’m not going back to the Navy. It’s really not all that drastic. I guess I’m just having a little diarrhea of the brain. It’s time to figure out what to do with my three months. I have some ideas! It’s been three years since my last cabaret so I’m thinking about writing another one. We’ll see. I want to take an on-camera class. It’s something I’ve been interested in a long time. Those that know me best know that my ultimate dream isn’t Broadway anymore. If I could have any career I would want to be on a detective show on tv! I know that sounds silly, but dreams are allowed to be silly. I think the reason I never even considered tv/film an option is because I’m a little overweight and I always assumed you had to be a size 0 to even think about it. That brings me to my next thing. Since I work from home and now have evenings free I have absolutely NO reason not to overhaul my diet/exercise regime. I have Jillian Michael’s 30-day shred, so how about I do a 90-day shred?

After all, my next role is an ingenue.

In a flapper dress.

And ingenues can’t have flabby arms. It’s my rule, nobody else’s.

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I call on Kate Winslet, my patron saint of AWESOME to get me through it.

Thank you for listening to my madness.

Yours always,

Harmony

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All I want for Christmas is you…

Tuesday, December 22nd, 2009

I’m sitting here watching the snow on my first day off in a long time. I feel really peaceful and pretty happy. If you had talked to me last week I was terribly low and frustrated. Such is life I suppose. Ups and Downs. Days like this are so special. Time to myself, beauty outside, and a positive outlook. What more can I ask for really?

We get distracted in this business. We are all so anxious to reach the next rung on our success ladder that sometimes we forget to take a breath and just enjoy the climb. We are not all destined for greatness. And even if we are, there is always a higher level of greatness to achieve. If we’re constantly yearning for something better that is not a very happy existence.

This year has been a little rough. I haven’t felt truly artistically stimulated since I did Bernarda Alba last fall. I’ve worked consistently, and they’ve all been good experiences in their own way. I would just love to do a show that makes my “gut rumble and my heart want to explode.” (-the lovely Kate Winslet) Funnily enough my two favorite theatrical experiences this year involved understudying. Going on for Man of La Mancha and Bombs Away were definite highlights of my year.

In the meantime I have tried to make the shows I’ve done as challenging as possible; I always want to learn something. I took an audition class with the amazing Doug Peck and Andy Hite. It really inspired me to work harder and not rest on my laurels. And I just keep trucking along. I look forward to the new year and new challenges.

Some words of sage advice for actors before I go:

1) For those that are still doing non-equity work, don’t be afraid to speak up when safety is concerned. With shows with smaller budgets a lot of times corners are cut to save money. If you feel unsafe at any time because of the set, costumes, or any other reason, SPEAK UP! You may be labeled a difficult actor for a day or two, but it’s better than the alternative of really hurting yourself. When you aren’t a member of the union, the only person truly looking out for you is YOU. So remember that.

2) Until you have a contract in your hand, you are not truly cast in a show. Remember that it feels great to be wooed for a part or a show, but that it doesn’t mean anything. A lot of times directors need to make sure that there are good people at their auditions. Basically they need to cover their bases. They need at least one person that will work for their production to show up at auditions or callbacks to cover each role. That doesn’t mean that when the audition comes that they won’t decide to cast the newcomer instead. So while it’s flattering, try to ignore it. Show up, audition, rock it out, and leave it to the Gods to decide.

That’s all! I really hope that all my friends and fellow artists have a wonderful Holiday. I’ll be with my family and I hope you’ll be with yours whether real or acquired. Enjoy each other. Treasure your lives, your loves, and your talents. I wish you the best in the New Year!

Love, Harmony

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