When I got the amazing news that I’d be playing Violet in Bailiwick Chicago’s Spring production of Violet I was absolutely thrilled, but there was a tiny voice in the back of my head that was saying, “What will be the sacrifice?” Call me superstitious, but whenever something really fantastic happens in my career I prepare for something crazy to happen in my personal life. I wait for “the other shoe to drop” so to speak.
The shoe dropped. It dropped in a major way. I’m not going to go into specifics. Let’s just say that nobody died, but I got a call on November 6th that changed my family forever. I had to leave right then and there to go be there for my family. I had to cancel gigs, benefits, some extra work, etc. Luckily everyone was very understanding. LUCKILY I was not involved in a full production at the time.
“LUCKILY I was not involved in a full production at the time.” That sentence is not something I thought I’d ever say. I have consistently put my career first. I’ve missed weddings, graduations, holidays, etc. so that I could work in my field. Even now I’m not sure if I would have come down here if it meant I had to leave a full production. I’d like to think I would have. I think I would have. I get so wrapped up in furthering my career and taking all the right steps and making all the right moves that it becomes my entire existence.
I remember being so upset and almost embarrassed that I didn’t have a fall show. I came very close on a couple of projects. One project in particular, a big one, I came so close on that it was almost torturous. I almost would have rather been cut on the first round of auditions, than to get so close I could taste it and not get it.
But now that I know what would have happened, I feel so relieved, so blessed, to be free to spend this time with my family. It hasn’t all been fun, quite the opposite actually. Some of the days I’ve been more stressed out and upset than I’ve been in my life. And I haven’t been Mother Theresa the whole time either. There have been days that I was bratty and impatient, but overall this has been such a period of growth and strength for me and for my family. I feel so honored to have spent such quality time with my family and that I’ve seen how strong our family still is, even in the face of hardship. I’ll remember this period of time and treasure it for the rest of my life.
And how does this translate to theater? The answer is, how does it NOT? I’m going to take every bit of this heartache and strength and pour it into Violet. Life is not always easy or what you expected it to be. Sometimes it really sucks. Sometimes you are pushed beyond what you thought your limitations were. I was. How can this do anything but make me a better daughter, sister, human being, and actor?
As actors we are limited to our experiences and our imagination. The more life you live, the more hardships you face head on, the more experience you have to bring to your craft, THE BETTER ACTOR YOU WILL BE.
So what’s the point of all this? Not sure. I guess it’s to live life. Don’t get so wrapped up in your career and the theatrical community that you forget to have an outside life. And hug your parents, brothers, sisters, grandpas, what have you. You never know how long you’ll have them.
Happy Holidays my dears
Harmony


































*****
A TALE OF TWO CITIES by Charles Dickens